Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness

As I was thumbing through this month's issue of Vanity Fair at the nail salon, I came across the following quote from an interview with model/actress Liberty Ross: "Something always has to completely die for there to be a rebirth." How true is that? Life really does function like a cycle. There comes a point where everything naturally tapers off to an end and there's no choice but to start anew. 

Whether I liked it or not, my life in New York was seemingly dwindling for the past three years. Work-wise, I'd been pouring in hours upon hours of work that had nothing to do with my skills (writing) or passion (writing). Love-wise, my heart hadn't been truly moved, which, I realize, was partially due to the fact that I was always completely spent from work.

So, there you go: work and love, the two main buckets in the life of a New Yorker. If you don't have one or the other, what've you really got? Yeah, exactly. You kind of go through the motions as you try to figure things out.

Just when I started to believe that the outlook was going to be bleak, the Universe threw me a bone. With instincts that had been lying dormant within me, I caught it. That's what you have to do when these rare moments occur: Catch it and run with it. Or, in my case, jump on a plane to California.








Is That All There Is? Que Sera Sera.

I've been reading my daily horoscope on a near-religious basis since I was eighteen years old and there's only one astrologist that I turn to for these forecasts: Holiday Mathis. She's masterful and wise and eloquent. I haven't found a better written horoscope column than hers, though, I can't take full credit for discovering it.

It was the year 2000 and I was hostessing that summer at a swanky restaurant in Downtown Houston to make extra money before moving to New York that August. I noticed that an attorney from L.A., who was in town on a three-month long case, would ask for the Houston Chronicle every time he came in for lunch. He told me that, despite traveling far and wide, he had never read a better horoscope column than Holiday's. Like him, I became hooked.

What I love about the way Holiday Mathis writes her forecasts is that there's always some guiding principle in it. She never says bogus things like "You will meet your one true love at the coffee shop around the corner at 3 p.m. on Friday." Her words paint a bigger perspective about life, and the beauty in her art lies in how she connects all of that greatness to you as an individual. "How does she know?" you'll wonder.

There are indeed times where you wish she didn't know. Like on the morning of Wednesday, June 19th, 2013, when I read this:

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). It goes something like this: You stray from the boring path, get lost, struggle, think you know where you're going, wind up worse off, try again, find your way back and are happy for the adventure of it all.

I mean, the woman summed up my whole adulthood in one sentence! If that's not talent, I don't know what is. I couldn't have said it better myself. You'd think she had to have lived a hundred lives to be that wise.

Please, oh please, tell me that this is not the story of my life, Holiday Mathis. 

This particular forecast really scared me because it's true. If you were to follow my life story up until now, you'd find that it's a bunch of scribbles instead of a strong, steady line. If you want to experience what that might feel like, imagine a really bad parallel parking job where you have to make a million minor adjustments before fitting into a parking spot. Yeah. That. It gets to the point where you wish the universe will just throw you a bone. Or, better yet, a fortune cookie. With the answer to all questions inside.

Then again, I'd have no material for this blog. (Could enough scribbles become a masterpiece? Like a Cy Twombly?)

Anyway, point is, I'm taking matters into my own hands. I'm going to consult a psychic. 







On Soulmates

People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mate’s purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master...
— from "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert