On Making Decisions

"You always know the right answer, somewhere inside of you, inside your heart," said my friend Leonie this past weekend when I told her about a tough decision that I had been struggling over for the past month. "I just don't know what to do," I sighed. The truth was I did know, but, still, l wanted to verify it with everyone around me, hoping for an outpouring of reassurance. Instead, I was a lone reed.

In my twenties, I wasn't afraid of making the so-called wrong decision. My intuition was still running on training wheels. There were times when the only way I could know what was right was to experience what was wrong. Now that I'm officially in my thirties, though, every decision feels like a major life decision. If I choose this over that, will my life really be spun onto a totally different trajectory?

Here's a very basic rule of thumb that I use to guide me: If it feels wrong, it probably is. No matter how many people you seek advice from, nobody will be able to feel that but you. You should always follow your gut instinct. Learning to trust it, on the other hand, is the hard part. At the end of the day, owning your own decisions is one of the most powerful, and empowering, things you can do for yourself.